We may hate to admit it but in one way or another, we are too in love with ourselves that we could spend hours in front of the mirror. Both men and women are like this. It is a fact that most of us could never get away with.
Women are fond of looking into the mirror while doing different facial expressions, putting makeups and a lot more. They simply cannot go out of their house without even glancing at the mirror to see how they actually look like in terms of their dress, makeup, hair and the like. If they find no mirror, some of them would surely panic.
Guys are also narcissistic just like women. The only difference is that you would not really spend hours, just a bit lesser than that of the girls. Well, whatever the reason would be, we only look at the mirror to find out whether we look attractive in front of many people most especially our crush.
However, while it is okay for you guys to tease on each other about this matter, girls on the other hand are very sensitive to it. If they hear you say something like: “Why do you always have to look into the mirror?” or “Is it really necessary for you to take a lot of pictures of yourself?” Surely, the girls would really be offended. They must be thinking: “Who are you to tell us what to do and not to do?” To help you understand more, let me share with you the very reasons why they hate it when you tell them that very statement:
- They get embarrassed if you notice her doing it.
Women do get embarrassed, most especially if they are caught by someone doing something really very personal. Of course, women do not want to show men that they are conscious about how they look. This is because they are thinking that you might get the wrong message.
If you let her know about this, she will probably hate you. She does not want you to have an impression that she is doing it to please you. After hating you, she, then, hates herself for not being to careful.
- They are not comfortable being seen by men doing such.
Looking into the mirror is something private, most especially for girls. That is why if they are seen by men and their attention is being caught, girls would most probably wish that they would disappear in front you. She wants to get out of the situation fast.
- They are conscious of what you might think about them.
The hardest part about this is that girls are very conscious about what you, guys, would think about her. You may say its paranoia but it is true. While you guys want to be at your best when approaching her, girls, in the same way, would also do anything just to make themselves really pleasing in front of guys. If they get caught, they would certainly get conscious about it.
Actually, there is nothing wrong if you show her that you are really interested in her and that you would do anything just to go out with you. Basically, it shows sincerity in which women would want from a man. But if you act like you are too obsessed in going out with her and that your world would fall apart if she does not go out with you, then that would be a different story. You are too creepy for her to go out with.
If you want women not to avoid you, then take everything slowly but surely. Be more patient in wooing her and determine as well whether you have gone overboard. Do not tell her right away that you like her because this might give the girl a wrong impression. Not unless you feel something good and positive about your conversation, then from there you can tell her what you feel. This is because, most likely, she also likes you.
When you meet a girl for the first time, I want you to remember the following:
- Do not ask for her number in the middle of the conversation.
It is quite unusual for you to ask for her number in the middle of the conversation. It would seem to look as if you are too eager to get it, which would only give her goosebumps. She might be thinking that you are just some one creepy stalker that she should avoid. So the best time for you to ask for her number is at the end of your talk. Ask it in a more creative manner.
- In asking her out, do not invite her to do something intense on your first date.
If you invite her, do not schedule an activity like hiking or something. You might be sending her a wrong message about your personality. To be sure and safe, a simple dinner would do on your first date.
I know you want your first date to be something special. But let me remind you that your first date is the determining point whether you are still going to have a second and third date. Thus, keep it simple by knowing her better and letting her know you better as well.
- Do not look too eager in asking her out.
Sometimes, you become pushy if you really want a girl. Hence, there will be a tendency that you will be just pushing her away from you instead of making her agree to go out with you. So be very careful with your move. Like they always say, take it slowly but surely.
- Do not make her feel guilty.
When she does not want to go out with you, do not show her that you are too devastated. Anyway, if she does not want to go out with you, there are still a lot of girls out there who could be much better than her.
- Do not let her feel as if she is the only one for you.
Your world does not revolve around her only. If she rejects your offer, accept it like nothing happened. Be cool. She might just change her mind in a few minutes.
While it is really ideal to offer an exceptional date like nature tripping and hiking, wall climbing, rafting or any other overactive dates, it would still be better if you would invite her to a simple date. This is because there is a tendency for her to say “no” if she finds it too complicated and difficult to get along.
Ask her for a simple date which she could just easily say “yes” like going to coffee shops or a dinner at some fine place. There is a greater possibility that she would agree to simple dates rather than going out for some sporty activities. I am telling you that women are very conscious beings. If they think they can’t do well with a certain activity, then she would never risk going out and get embarrassed.
For women who are into sports, overactive dates could work well. But for the rest, simple dates would be much better. Do not force her into doing something that she is not fond of. You might just annoy or intimidate her. So to be safe, first ask her to a simple date and if everything works out well, then perhaps you could level up.
I know that you are just conscious of impressing her. But taking her to an intense date would only make her think that you are too insecure to take her into these activities rather than simply talking to her. A few ideas that I could share with you:
- Invite her to a beach date
Beach is really relaxing. You can chill and get away with stress. In the same way, beach is also a perfect place for you to date and talk alone. With a good ambiance and beautiful environment, you would surely be able to have a good time talking with each other. A calm and peaceful setting could add up to the success of your first date.
- Have a picnic with her
Most of us are fond of eating. This, perhaps, is a way for us to effectively socialise with other people. So on your date, you can try a simple picnic with a girl. You can share a lot of things with her and likewise listen to what she wants to tell you. While eating or having a tea, you can get to know more about her and let her know more about you too.
- Offer her a drink at some quiet bar
Inviting her to a bar for a drink is not that bad. But make sure that such place is not that loud for you to effectively talk together. A chill lounge may also do. Remember that what matters most in a date is your ability to converse with her in such a manner that she never gets bored. This would be your advantage over other good looking men out there.
- Invite her to your place and watch a movie.
Inviting her over your place to watch movie could also be a good idea. After you watch the movie, you can perhaps talk about it or other matters that you think would interest her.
Women are just anywhere, I tell you. But what makes it difficult for you to pick up a girl in random is that you would be dealing with an absolute stranger. You do not know anything about her and she does not know you either. The chances of getting a girl to date are quite small. So, if I were you, I would pick up someone whom I have already known for years or at least a few months.
A good candidate for you to go out with is your co-worker. You would probably get along well with each other. Since you are both working in the same place, then there is a great possibility that what she likes is also what you like. It is a perfect match indeed.
One advantage in dating a co-worker is that you already know a bit about her. In fact, if you have been partners for years, then you would most probably know a lot of things about her. You get along with each other well and you share the same interest.
However, such love story would not always end up with a “happily ever after”. Simply because you do not know whether she is interested in going out with you or that she is not yet open to go out with anyone else. Quite risky, eh?
Well, there is actually no harm in trying. True, there may be downsides in picking up a co-worker but at least you could be positive enough to get your co-worker to agree in going out with you. Let me share with you some tips that you could use in asking your co-worker out:
- Always prepare for the worse.
When you ask her out, do not expect her to immediately say yes to your invitation. Prepare yourself to receive a rejection and take it easily. Accept the worst thing that could happen. Remember that you both work in the same place. You sure do not want to have a bad working relationship with your co-worker.
- Ask someone who works at a different department.
Although they say that going out with someone you really know is an advantage, still, it would be much better to go out with someone you haven’t come across with every day, at least. A girl from the other department could be a good choice. Sometimes, going out with someone you have known for years could lead to unfortunate drama. So avoid from getting into that point.
- Respect her decision.
Whenever she says no, respect it. You will always have the chance to meet a better woman. Remember to put yourself into her shoes to understand her more. What would you feel if you are on the same situation? In this way, you would be able to understand why she rejected your offer. Do not play hard on her. Accept it that you are not just her type.
- Be discreet with this matter.
Women do not want men who are tattletale. Be a man and keep it to yourself. Do not embarrass her by telling almost everyone about what happened.
I understand that you get scared at first when you have the chance to talk to her. Being nervous is actually really normal for everybody, even those who are “experts” at this. It only shows that you are romantically interested in her that is why you feel that butterflies in your stomach.
When we get nervous, we sometimes resort to our creativity just to get to talk to her. I know you must be thinking of sending her text messages or emails or you would interact with her through social networking sites. However, there are really some who thinks way beyond what we can think of, and that is to send messages or love notes through the girl’s close friends. Sounds brilliant? Well, I do not think so that is why I will not recommend it to you. Here are the reasons why you should not use her friends as your bridge towards her:
- You might just send her the message that you are really coward to face her.
If you keep on sending her notes or messages through her friends, she might only think that you are not man enough to face her. It turns a woman off if a guy is doing this kind of tactic. It only implies that you do not have the confidence to really come to her and talk to her personally. Men may have fears but if they are man enough, they would certainly be able to surpass it. That is the true essence of manhood.
- Not only that you would look bad in front of her but also to her friends.
Sending messages to her through her friends would only disclose everything that should only be kept between you and the girl. That is why if something happens along the way, expect that her friends would also be able to know everything. You will not only be embarrassed in front of her but also to her friends. That is the sad truth if you are too vulgar with your friends. You get to know everything with no exceptions.
Remember that girls are “talkative” by nature. So if she turns you down, the whole club certainly knows about it with an eyebrow raised on you.
- She might be thinking that you are only interested in one of her friends.
Making her friends as your bridge towards her might send her the wrong message. She might only think that you are actually interested with one of her friends and not her. I tell you, women are sensitive and also jealous. They are susceptible of thinking a lot of things without even you thinking about it.
If you are really sincere about getting closer to her, then do not use her friends. Stand up and be a man. Do your move before anyone else does.
- Worst, she would just treat you like a “boy”.
The worst part of this scenario is that she would only be treating you as a “boy”, someone who is not a man enough and immature to play games on her. So if you do not want her to treat you that way, gather yourself and talk to her one on one.