If you are a veteran, then picking up a girl would never be too difficult for you to do. But if you are still new to this, say you have tried a few tries and then get rejected by girls, then you probably need some help.
What went wrong? You are the only one who can tell that. Perhaps you have said something offensive or you have actually said nothing. Likewise, you might have done something that she does not like or she could have been waiting for you to do your move for quite a long time already and you have not done anything. Well, whatever the reason might be, remember that there are always two sides of the coin. You get one side and lose the other. So which side have you actually gained and which side have you lost?
If you are really serious about taking her on a date, then you should have extended your effort to the nth level. I am not telling you though to really get serious on this. At least, if you want a good result, then you better do something extra.
She might just be another girl in the neighbourhood whom you want to go out with. Hence, you have to get to know her better by looking her up on some social networking sites. Girls would appreciate it if you make efforts to know her better secretly. If you try to search her on these sites, I suggest that you should know the following:
- Her complete name
Of course, it would be awkward to go out with someone whom you do not know her name. Well I guess, even before you come into this social networking site, you already have an idea of what her first name is. This could be enough but like I said, put an extra effort in knowing her better.
Know her full name. But if she does not disclose it due to some security reasons, at least you would know how she is being called by her closest friends and her immediate family.
- Her immediate family and close friends
You should at least get acquainted with people that surround her, which includes her siblings, parents and close friends. From this, you would have an idea whom to go to just in case you really want to get closer with her. Be strategic and creative. However, do not appear like you are a stalker because it might just scare and intimidate her.
- Her favourite colour
This might sound odd but yes, knowing her favourite colour helps. If you are successful in inviting her to a date, then you could at least give her something like a bouquet of flowers wrapped in a sheet with her favourite colour. That move is really impressive, I tell you.
- Her interests
By looking into her likes and dislikes, you would already have an idea where you could take her and what you could talk about on your first date. This could be an advantage because surely, you would not end up taking her to a place that she really does not like.
By this time, you should be able to differentiate bragging from merely showing her what makes you special. The former is only a bluff while the latter has the substance. Remember that girls really get amazed with men who can show themselves as really special and different from other typical guys. When you do this, make sure that you never lie to her about anything, or even exaggerate certain matters. Just be true and show her that what you are showing her is really genuine.
There are actually a lot of guys out there who actually knows nothing but brags about a lot of things. Women can sense that. If they feel that you are just lying and everything you said was just a mere bluff, then expect that you would not be able to see her again. Not only that you have lost one but you would most probably lose a number in the future for being branded as such. So be very careful with your actions because you can never tell that some other girls are just around observing you.
What I am trying to point out here is that you only show her what you’ve got and not what you do not have. How would you be able to make yourself irresistible in front of girls? Let me share you some tips that you might as well consider:
- Admit that you are quite weird sometimes, but in a good way.
Right from the start you can tell her right away that you are quite weird. She might be confused why you are telling this to her. Well, this could only be an ice breaker for her to get hooked up on the things that you have to say.
You can perhaps tell her that you like dogs you love to take them to a walk every day or you are into some theatrical performances and would like to invite her some of these days. You can share anything about you. Hearing these “weird” activities that you can barely expect from a man would only make her intrigued about you and thus make her wanting you more.
- If you know how to play the guitar, you can sing her a few songs.
It may be too old fashioned but playing the guitar in front of girls would still work all the time. For instance, you came from a music gig and you happen to pass by your crush, you can initiate some talking first. You can either offer to let her hear your song or you would wait for her to insist on it. But I tell you, girls would most probably do the latter because women love songs, most especially sung by men.
Although you do not have to bring with you your guitar at all times, you can still let her know that you know how to play one and perhaps invite her to one of your gigs.
- Show her some of your masterpieces.
If you are an arts enthusiast, you can invite her to see some of your masterpieces like photos or painting. Girls do appreciate art and they would most probably appreciate it if you show them your artworks.
It is not being desperate to invite someone for a date who is a complete stranger to you. Of course, you really cannot tell that among those strangers that you see every day, one of them could be the woman whom you are going to spend the rest of your life with. Well, I know that it is a bit too advance to think that way but what I am trying to point out is that it is not impossible to meet eligible women on the road.
Meeting new people on the road is definitely more exciting than you think. You can get to know different people with different personalities. If you are an open-minded person and do not confine your search on certain qualifications, then you would definitely find great women even just on the road.
You could be as creative as you can and be witty when you say your first line. To help you have an idea of what I am talking about, here are some tips that I would like to share with you. Make this as your guide whenever you do the “move”:
- Do not appear too confident.
What turns off a lady is when a guy would approach her and speak to her as if he is a super hottie. Even if you are, you still have to back off and approach the lady in a more gentle way. Women do not want men who are too confident about themselves. I really cannot exactly tell why we, women, could sense that. I guess it is just part of our very sensitive intuition. That is why if a woman looks at you with an eyebrow raised, I suggest you better forget what you are planning.
- Be straightforward.
Forget the “ums”, “ah”, “eh” and other annoying fillers. Your nervousness is too obvious. When you want to tell her something, be straightforward. You could at least prepare or rehearse a bit if you are really not sure about what you are going to tell her. But of course, even if you have prepared for that line, make it appear as if everything is spontaneous and natural.
- Do it quickly.
If you like the girl, do not have some second thoughts. Approach her right away. You might just lose your chance. She could either leave the bus too soon or go somewhere else you could no longer reach. Grab the opportunity when you have it. You have got nothing to lose anyway if you try.
- Make it light.
When you approach a lady, do not assume that you will immediately spend the rest of your life with her. Do not take it too seriously as it would only give you disappointments in the end. Remember, you are the guy. You control everything. Thus, let the girl keep you wanting more.
Whether you are in a travel or just happened to drop by that area, anything could happen in an instant. You can meet a lot of nice people. You just have use this opportunity well and make sure that you do not get attached that much.
Women have already been hearing a lot of compliments in their entire life. That is why if you make one, make sure it is something different and definitely true. Do not just make this as an alibi to strike a conversation with her. When you compliment her, mean it. This is because women are sensitive enough to feel that you might just be kidding her.
There are somewhat rules, so to speak, when it comes to complimenting a woman whenever you get to meet her. I have some up a list of dos and don’ts that I would like to share with you in order for you to be aware that what you are telling her is already going overboard.
- Do not overdo in appreciating her.
If you do not want to sound creepy, then do not exaggerate in giving her compliments. Telling her that her blue eyes really turn you on could sound too pushy and weird. She may either raise an eyebrow on you or just disregard you. Worse, she would never talk to you ever again. So if you are trying to make a move, do it in a more nominal manner.
- Congratulate her when she has done something well.
If she has done something really exceptional, grab this chance to meet her and congratulate her. This could be the perfect timing for you to strike a conversation with her or even ask her out by the end of your talk. This is your only chance to stay closer to her so do not waste it.
Congratulating her is one way of showing your interest in her. She really appreciates it when you appreciate her. But remember the first rule, do not overdo it. Overdoing it would only annoy and intimidate her.
- Hope you had a research first before blurting out a compliment for her.
Doing a research really helps. It only shows that you are not just complimenting her randomly unlike what other players out there do. If you happen to have the class with her, you can say: “I really liked the joke you made earlier” or that “What you did yesterday in class was awesome”. I am quite sure she would smile to that.
- You can tell her what you think about her.
If you are really not familiar with her, you can at least tell something about what you think about her or similar to that tenor. For instance you would say: “I saw you yesterday playing volleyball. I bet you are the top player.”
Remember to be suave in telling this to her because doing otherwise would create a different result.
- Complimenting her on the way she looks works all the time.
One of the most common compliments that you can give to a girl is about her looks. Although it has been commonly used, it still works all the time. This tactic will never fail you. However, make sure that when you say these magic words, do it in a manner that is not so creepy.
- Be more specific and not try some overused compliments
When you compliment her and try a little something new. Never try to compliment her by chance because surely she would just ignore you.
If you have seen her alone, and seems open for a conversation, then this could be your time to make your move and talk to her. You can start by saying a simple “Hi” or “How’s it going?” if you two have already been acquainted. You can talk about something that both of you know. Be creative and be spontaneous.
However, in striking a conversation with a girl, it does not mean that you have to do all the talking. Actually, the rule here is to let her do the talking. Why? For simple reasons, first, she should be the highlight in the conversation, and second, she might only think that you are just playing around because you do all the talking.
Whether she is a shy one or if you feel that she is quite reluctant to talk to you, still let her talk. I am quite sure that she has a lot to say. You may add on to what she says or make a comment. But never steal the floor from her. You just have to initiate it. If she responds well and shares a lot of things to you, then you are on the right path.
Keep in mind that while you let her do the talking, you also have to do your part. This is because if she notices that she is the only one talking, then she might feel that you are bored or uninterested in her. Listen to her when she talks and keep your eye contact fixed on her.
I would like to share to you some rules when it comes to this matter. If you let her talk, then I hope you would consider the following:
- Do not interrupt when she talks.
It would be quite disrespectful if you will interrupt her in the middle of her talk. Well, it is okay to interject some insights regarding the matter but never disrupt her to a point that she had already lost the momentum of telling you the story.
You can interrupt her for some good reasons. Perhaps you can do it once or thrice but never do it many times. She will just get annoyed and would most probably avoid to talk with you again. So be sensitive about it.
- You do not have to wait for her to finish her story before you also share yours.
There are times, for good reasons, that you can interrupt her while she is talking. You do not have to wait for her to end it. If you have something to share that can be related to the matter that you are talking about, then feel free to do so. She would appreciate it.
- Listen carefully to every detail.
How would you feel if the person you are talking to is not paying attention? That is why, when she talks, listen very carefully even to the smallest detail. She would know that you are not listening if you keep on asking the same questions over and over again.
- React appropriately to what she is saying.
Reacting to her stories would only show that you are really interested in her. You can nod or say something as a form of affirmation.